


break in, break out (CRinktober 2019)

by gingerminded



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Awkwardness, CRinktober, Crossover, Drabble Collection, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I love them so much, I need help, Kissing, M/M, Writober, crinktober2019, deep, i'm trying so hard guys believe me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2020-01-21
Packaged: 2020-11-09 03:26:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 6,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20846753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingerminded/pseuds/gingerminded
Summary: CRinktober drabble collectionall the rules for my writober areherelast chapter: embrace (caleb/essek, frumpkin)





	1. favorite character (caleb/molly)

Caleb doesn’t have much left from his past life, only ugly scars and frightening memories, that sometimes keep him up late at night. 

He sees it all very clearly every time he closes his eyes: dark red and deep green colors of blood pouring over residium, piercing his arms; and blood on his knuckles, but somebody else’s at this time; and flames, bright and somewhat charming, until you hear screams and start to smell burning flesh.

Caleb doesn’t have much now, only millions and billions of reasons why he is the worst person in the world (in alphabetical order) and a group of weirdos around him who try to tell him that he’s actually... good?

He talks to Molly a lot, probably more than he should, probably more than he ever talked to someone. He probably allows Molly and especially himself more than he should, but these aren’t the thoughts you need when you’re getting kissed in complete darkness, isn’t it?

“People trust me with their stories, but they really shouldn't, don’t you think?”, Molly says on one of those evening talks, “I sure look like one of the most untrustworthy you’ve ever met, aren't I, mister Caleb?”

“You really don’t, mister Mollymauk”, Caleb chuckles and smiles softly, feeling Molly’s tail gently curling around his waist.

“Is that so?”, Molly carefully places his head on Caleb’s shoulder, “I’m happy to hear that”.

Caleb doesn’t have much but he definitely has something and it’s truly amazing.


	2. campaign one/two (caleb/essek)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> based on my shadowgast university au  
caleb teaches chemistry, essek right now teaches theory of probability

It’s a lunch break at university right now so they’re both hanging out at Essek’s study and complaining. Caleb just finished his emotional talk about two freshmen and their failed attemps of blowing up the chemistry class and went to the coffee machine.

“They’re _so_ dumb!” Essek suddenly screams loudly slamming his head into the table and scaring the shit out of Caleb who almost drops his mug.

“Yes, you said that… three times already? I want clear facts, _Schnecke_”, Caleb sits down opposite Essek and takes a huge gulp of coffee.

“You can’t call me a snail when my students still don’t understand the very basic probability stuff, mister Chemistry”, Essek says still lying face down on the table. Caleb gently runs his fingers through Esseks hair and hears him murmuring something completely incomprehensible.

“What?”

“I said life just got better”, he puts his hand on Caleb’s and strokes it slightly. “And they are still stupid.”


	3. potion (fjord & caduceus)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i love cad and i love cad comforting people

Is Caduceus frightened right now? Sure, because he sure doesn't often see his friends piercing themselves with their falchions. Fjord just sits in front of him on the floor, unable to focus.

“Caduceus…” he says quietly. “Caduceus, i’m scared”.

Of course, he notices the accent, but it’s the least important thing right now. What he does is a simple hug, long and as gentle as possible.

“You’re strong, Fjord, you know? You’re really strong” he says, rocking Fjord slightly.

Fjord doesn’t know how long they just sit there, he just listens to his restless breathing, feels Caduceus’ serene ones and starts to calm down a little. The next thing he remembers is a soft touch of his lips on his forehead and a steam coming from the mug.

"Is it some kind of potion?" Fjord asks still looking not good but at least a bit calmer now and then adds “Sorry, I don’t know why i asked that”

"Oh, yes, sure", Caduceus smiles gently and passes him the tea. “The best healing potion you could ever find. With ginger”. 

His voice is low and so soothing, Fjord almost forgets what just happened.

“Thank you.”


	4. monster (gen)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i just---- love them all so much
> 
> also: campaign 2 spoilers

We’re all different but at the same time so similar.

We all have our own monsters.

We all have our own fears. 

Look at her. She is scared. She is scared that she’ll never understand who she really is. She is scared that she has nothing other than cute freckles and a weird — _he’s so cool, guys_ — patron. She tries so hard, she really does, but that feeling never goes away.

Look at him. He is also so very scared. He’s not scared of being killed, but being founded and captured. He’s scared of himself, he hates himself so much it sometimes hard to breathe. “I don’t have monsters in my head, I’m a monster myself” is what he thinks each and every day.

Look at him. Look at his powers and his beautiful sword, listen to him talk. He’s so scared. Scared of being himself after all those years, scared of not being heard again. He is now scared to sleep sometimes, because it’s dark out there, because it’s cold and all he has is countless yellow eyes and that voice.

Look at her. Oh, poor thing, she is scared shitless. She looks at the one who doesn’t want to be himself and hates him for that, because she can’t. It’s a luxury, being able to be with her family again, to finally raise her son. She has all the money and tons of stupid trinkets, she doesn’t remember the last time she looked in the mirror without tears, she doesn’t remember the last time she could be near water and stay calm without booze.

Look at him. Full of hopes, stupid dreams and wide white smiles. Always talking, always laughing, always making up something. He’s so scared. He knew he got his life back for some reason but never knew why. “I’m just having a lot of fun,'' he says, “Trying to make peoples’ lives a little bit better than before”. The last breath was the scariest, but he has no fears anymore.

Look at her. No memory, no family, no loved one. Look at her carefully picking all those flowers for maybe no one, look at her trying to laugh and trying to talk and joke sometimes. She’s scared, so scared. She picks up her sword time after time, she hopes that all her dreams are just dreams. She now raises her Magician’s Judge above her friends. And cries. 

Look at him. Living alone for so long, losing all his family and being too scared to ask his goddess about them. And being so interested in this great big world and not understanding shit. He smiles, he supports them all. He hears “do you smile when you’re scared?” and immediately answers: “Yes”. He smiles _all the time_.

Look at her. Of course, she’s scared. She’s forthright and kinda rude, and she also was never properly raised and was never properly loved. She scammed people, betrayed them and spitted blood in their faces. She learned how to fight and how to stay alive, she’s scared she will never learn how to be a better person. She’s actually so scared of being alone again.

We all have our own monsters.

We all have our own fears. 

They… They’re lucky enough to have each other.


	5. drinks (caleb/molly)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hupperdook, alcohol and widomauks

Hupperdook meets them with empty streets during the day and surprises with colourful loud party in the night. As Molly said, they already got almost fully Complete Party Experience.

“And the fuck is that?”, Beau asked when they we’re sitting in the tavern after winning the drinking contest. 

“Oh, it’s simple, sweetheart,'' he answers, barely dodging Beau’s fist. “Have you heard about three ‘gets’?”

“Firstly, it is to get beautiful, of course”, he smiles widely and points into the flowers on his horns. They all had a lot of alcohol already but Molly moves as smooth as ever, gently placing one blue flower into Caleb’s hair, making him flinch a bit, “Like this”. Jester being Jester giggles and does a little boop action into Caleb’s cheek.

“Second and the most important thing is to…” he dramatically spreads his hand and makes a pause. “... get drunk”. The tavern keeper brings them another round of drinks, and Molly continues. “And we’re doing amazing right now”.

They drink and they talk and they dance a lot. Jester is waltzing with Caleb, Molly is spinning Nott around to the applause and laughter of Fjord and Beau. Of course, Molly comes to Jester and asks if he can borrow her partner. Caleb lubberly scratches his head and smiles, looking at Jester who winks at him.

They slowly dance around the room, Caleb’s head on Molly’s chest.

“You said three,” Caleb says eventually when they sit down somewhere in the far-far corner.

“What?” 

“Three ‘gets’,” Caleb explains when they stop for a second.

“Oh,” Molly smiles and softly kisses Caleb on the forehead. “Get happy.”


	6. lights (caleb/essek)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> xhorhouse, two book boys and their small talk

When Essek visits their residence — it’s Xhorhouse! — once again it happens without Jester calling him in the middle of his sleep, it just happens. He would be lying if he said that they don’t interest him, he would be lying even more if he said that they don’t annoy him so very much. 

He talks to Beau and Jester, even drinks Caduceus’ tea this time and notices Caleb not being with everybody else.

“Oh, he’s in his room. Doing some magic stuff,” Nott says and, of course, continues with, “Caleb, you know, he’s very smart!”

"Yes, i actually do," Essek nods with almost unnoticeable smile and walks — glides — to Caleb's room. He knocks gently a couple of times, but hears no response and slowly opens the door.

Caleb lies on the floor, a pillow under his head, a book on his face. Four small white are floating around this small room, creating soft dim light.

"Hello," Caleb says, stretching his hands into the air.

"Everything's alright?" Essek asks, looking around the room with much noticeable smile this time.

"Yes. I was studying. And then sleeping, apparently", Caleb finally sits up, moves his head from left to right with a slight crack and looks at Essek. "And then you triggered my alarm."

“So sorry to interrupt,” Essek chuckles, pushing one of the globules around the room. 

“Apologies accepted,” Caleb pushes one back to him. “I got this new spell. But you probably know it already”

“Oh,'' Essek, to Caleb’s surprise, closes the door behind him and sits down on the floor near him. “Let’s take a look”.


	7. favorite spell (gen)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> caleb, frumpkin and a little bit of angsty backstory

He makes his familiar appear for the first time when he is still in Solstryce Academy, hiding him from everybody around. He was sitting in the far corner of his room late at night, exploring the spell, but mostly petting Frumpkin and listening to him purring at his side.

Ikithon always tells Caleb that he is weak, that he needs to study better, to train harder, to love Empire more and to feel less. Caleb may be weak but he never even flinches when cold sharp residium enters his veins, he may be not smart enough or not strong enough but he learns his lessons well, he kills his victims well, he remembers things even better than ‘well’.

Days go by, sleeping becomes hard and believing becomes even harder, but Ikithon’s speeches are really convincing. He hears his parents talking about some weird plans, about overthrowing the king and Caleb finally breaks. Caleb cries almost to unconsciousness, breathing heavily while sending a message about this betrayal to academy. He doesn’t sleep even one minute that night, he again asks Frumpkin to come out and tries not to scream.

When he lights up his house with a fireball, he doesn’t utter a sound.

When he hears his parents scream, he drops down on his knees and laughs. 

And then he starts to run.


	8. friends (gen)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> caleb and Deep Thoughts™

Friend is a strong word. 

It means involvement. It means commitment. It means loyalty.

It also probably means having enough power for all of the above, but Caleb just… doesn’t. He can’t say that he still doesn’t care, that he still just uses them, because it’s not true anymore — if it even ever was. He’s still afraid, he still knows that they remember about him and remember well.

“No close connections”, he keeps repeating to himself when they all laugh at Jester’s shenanigans and he feels safe and comfortable. 

“You just can’t, stop it” he says to himself once again but his palm is still warm after Beau’s firm handshake and her “we’re all here together, Caleb, you and me, and Nott, and all of us, you know?” is still echoing inside his head.

They travel and fight again and again, they help each other and they help people around and sometimes — often —- they do stupid things. Together.

He thinks a lot, he watches everyone a lot, he opens up.. not a lot, but he tries.

“Why can’t I?” he finally asks himself one day, while keeping watch alone again and looking at the stars.

Friend is a strong word. It means involvement, commitment and loyalty. It also means not being alone with your fears.


	9. favorite arc (fjord/caleb)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fjord, caleb, kisses and blood

They both still don’t understand what’s happening in the world around them, with them and especially between them. It all is just… weird and strange, and strange and weird.

They try to talk it out, they really do, but it turns out to be harder than it looks when it was just an idea.

_“We now have one, two,'' Caleb mumbles some numbers and then continues, “eleven awkward kisses, two drunk ones… and one falchion near my throat back in Zadash”. _

_Fjord attempts to say something other that “oh, wow” but fails completely._

_“Yes, I remember,” Caleb says, squeezing Fjords hand a bit more than necessary._

_“I know you do.”_

They now stand in front of each other, underwater, resting after a battle, eyes on the pedestal. 

They’re both clever enough to understand that it needs blood, they’re both dumb enough to give it some.

They start to speak at the same time.

“Can I count on you to return the favor?”

“How about a good luck kiss?”

“What?”

“What? Yes, favor. Always.”

Caleb’s face changes slightly from his usual emotionless expression, and Fjord notices the smile. Caleb just quickly rises on his tiptoes to reach Fjord’s lips and gently kisses him, blowing some air bubbles in his direction after.

“That’s… nice,’ Fjord says, and then they cut their hands.


	10. weapon (fjord/jester)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fjord and jester have a talk

After a hard fight with an ancient dragon and not very pleasant goat trip back to Kravaraad the sword is finally getting made. 

Fjord still feels a lot off, wandering around the Kiln and not really understanding what to do. He tried what he did every time to check his powers several times, but... no bird appeared.

Everyone seems to be busy but he notices Jester sitting somewhere in the far corner near the wall, hugging her knees.

“Hey, you’re alright?” Fjord quietly asks taking a seat near her. “You seem… worried?

Jester flinches a bit before looking at Fjord with her usual wide smile.

“Who, me? It’s like, totally not true, okay?” she pokes Fjord into his hand. “We just fought a dragon and won, and Beau kissed Reani, that was so hot, oh my god”.

“Yes, um…” Fjord always doesn't understand how to answer to Jesters speeches, but right now he feels that she is really not that fine. “So..”

“And now we have that cool iceflex for the sword and you’re going to be super buff and super strong now after all those push-ups, and your tusks are finally visible and beautiful again” she continues, speaking faster and faster.

“And maybe after we’ll be able to go to Nicodranas and visit my mama, and Traveler Con is gonna happen really soon, and we all need to prepare and I need to prepare, and…” she doesn’t look at Fjord at all, she just talks and talks and talks.

“Jester…” Fjord says softly.

“And there’s this Obann guy and the Laughing Hand and they have Yasha and there’s war, and…” her voice cracks a bit and Fjord moves a bit closer.

“Jester!” he says, a lot louder this time.

“And it is so hard, Fjord, and it is so scary. What if something happens to you or to Beau or to Nott, or Caleb, or Caduceus or Beau…”

“JESTER!”

“Wha—” she turns to Fjord and immediately feels his lips on hers. His lips are nothing like those from her books, they’re chapped and really-really warm and Jester can definitely feel Fjord’s tusks. It all was so fast and unexpected, she doesn’t even utters when she feels a gentle stroke on her head and not even when Fjord backs off, looking as awkward as she never lets herself to.

They both sit there for a couple of minutes, Jester’s face in her palms and Fjord’s face facing the ceiling.

“Everything is gonna be alright, okay”, he stands up and feels a light tug on his belt.

“Okay”, Jester smiles and lets him go.


	11. shopping (caleb/essek)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (i got reminded that i have a shadowgast uni au)
> 
> caleb, essek and books

“So, what are we buying this time?” Essek asks while being dragged by his arm by Caleb.

“Is that really a question when you already know the answer?” Caleb says slowing down a bit and then stopping near the traffic light.

“Yes, it’s books, even if i prefer to buy you a new coat which doesn’t appear on Ugly Coats Instagram, but, of course, it’s books”, Essek stands there, leaning against Caleb and trying to balance on his Heelys. “You know, you can buy them on Amazon these days? Even as pdfs”

“Don’t even start, you love my ugly coats almost as much as I love my ugly coats. And...,” Caleb chuckles and they continue their way to an old bookshop. “... and you can’t find all those wonderful old tomes on your A-ma-zon.”

They spend a good two or three hours there, chatting with the owner, a cute old lady she is, but mostly looking through dozens of books of all shapes and sizes.

“Really? No, really?” Essek closes a popular science linguistics book he was skimming over and looks at Caleb holding a big pile of … “Manga?”

“I almost have the whole collection and now I will only need to find two last ones”, Caleb says with a wide smile on his face, his eyes almost glowing with excitement. “And I even found some old magazines well-suited for my research! And your research! This place is truly amazing.”

“So manga and magazines it is” Essek laughs quietly, tosses the book he was holding onto the top of the pile and helps Caleb to carry everything to the check-out.


	12. pride (gen, caleb & cad)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> caleb stays with ikithon and the assembly  
i use the name "bren" cause i guess he had no reasons to become caleb

The world is corrupted inside and out. 

People are stupid. Xhorhas and Kryn are very dangerous. Empire is still weak. War is important.

Magic is absolute. 

Knowledge is absolute.

Cerberus Assembly is absolute, and Bren knows that.

Bren knows, and so he withstands all the trainings silently and the real torture from the enemy is like a vacation to him now: it’s amazing how easily they get angry when he smiles.

He spies and he hides and he kills, and kills, and kills: he burns the evil with countless fireballs and his own scary fire webs, he snaps necks with his bare hands like they are twigs, he doesn’t bother with cleaning his clothes from the blood anymore, cause it’s just useless.

“Are you proud? You should be. The Empire will be the winner in this war,” Ikithon talks a lot these days, too much if you ask Bren.

“Of course,'' he swallows audibly, “Of course, I am”. 

He leaves for Rosohna tomorrow.

* * *

Good memory comes in handy when you’re imprisoned. 

Five days, six hours, forty seven minutes, five seconds, six, seven, eight… He counts to not lose his consciousness, he never looks at them who talk and ask and hit him, he remains silent.

Five days, eight hours, twenty eight minutes, they never come at this time of the day, but someone talks to him for ten minutes already. When the door opens, he still only looks at the floor, but also smells the herbs and hears a large figure sit down in front of him. 

He said that it’s hard to lie to him before he went here. Bren coughs slightly, feeling every cell of his lounges hurt and raises his gaze to what he now knows is a tall firbolg. 

“You have eyes of a murderer,” they always told him. “Good, Bren, good.”

“I’m sorry,” the person says, his low voice cracking a bit. “I’m so, so sorry. Oh my god, what do they make you do out there, in the Assembly?”

Bren can’t hold a chuckle.

“Do you really want to die so badly?” 

_ “Are you proud? You should be,” he hears in his head once again. _

_ “No. Never was.” _


	13. environment (fjord/caleb)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> asarius, fjord/caleb and their smol talk

“That’s okay, Fjord,” Caleb takes a handful of mud and smears it all over his face and hair. “I don’t care if I'm treated like this, I just don’t want any attention”. 

“I do”, Fjord says looking at those two orcs as they walk away.

“What?” Caleb asks as he feels Fjord’s cold fingers gently stroking his hand. “Oh, _Dummkopf_, you can have all the attention. Let’s start walking, we need to catch up with the group”

Fjord says nothing in return right away but bumps his forehead into Caleb’s one and pulls a small bit of dirt out of Caleb’s hair.

“You know what I meant,” he says quietly.

“_Ja_, I do,” Caleb closes his eyes for a second and takes a deep breath, finding Fjord hand with his once again.


	14. dress (gen, little beau & jester action)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> beau puts on a dress for the first time after a long long time

When Beau puts on a dress, it just feels weird. Not bad, certainly not good, just weird. She stands in front of a mirror, rocking up and down on her feet and looking at herself.

She spins, watching the skirt flowing, does a couple of low kicks and jumps a bit from right to left. Beau lets down her hair and after another second of staring she tries one of those “girls from books about nobles” moves. She tries a curtsy, remembers that thing when Jester pulls her skirt back and glares at people and she tries that too.

Someone — she knows who — knocks on the door Beau now stands still again feeling even more awkward than before and tries to put her hands into pockets with her usual hand motion but finds nothing.

“I found you a really super cool hat, Beau,” Jester happily yells.

“Of course you did”, Beau murmures silently and opens the door.


	15. romance (molly/caleb, musicians au)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> molly has an amazing surprise for everyone at his concert or Molly Loves Caleb So Fucking Much

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mostly based on [this vid](https://youtu.be/JG_d9DHUor0)

Everyone knows how Molly behaves at his concerts. 

He drinks and it doesn’t matter if it’s water, beer or his favorite gin and tonic. He moves a lot around the stage and talks a lot in between the songs, jumps into his audience and plays on his old acoustic guitar with candles as his only light. 

And, oh God, he loves “mister Widogast” a lot and he lets everyone to know about it via lives, tweets and interviews.

When Caleb walks out onto the stage, the crowd screams and Molly smiles wider than ever, looking at Caleb and only at Caleb. They talk and they laugh and they announce their new song that they wrote together.

“We’re gonna sing it now, but, of course,'' Molly chuckes, “I don't remember half of the words!”

“But Caleb sure does!” someone shouts and he shrugs his shoulders.

The music starts and Molly still looks at nothing and nobody, but Caleb when he kisses his hand with a slight bow or comes a little closer than he probably suppose to and keeps looking when Caleb smiles and accidentally — or not — sings some phrases in German and when he moves around and rocks in time with the beat and when he suddenly stops in the middle of the line and starts to laugh because Molly runs out of breath and hugs him.

“I won, _Sonnenschein_,” Caleb whispers to his ear.

“I never had any doubts, my dear,” Molly slightly strokes his head, “We can do it, right?”

“Sure, of course, we can”, Caleb chuckles once again.


	16. crossover (gen, HP au)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> harry potter au: molly is a death eater and caleb is really stubborn

Caleb blames himself and himself only for his failed apparition and escape and hates that stupor before casting Fiendfyre at his lab.

“We just need your research on the veritaserum, that’s all,” he says over and over again while doing everything to make Caleb talk. 

He leaves long red scratches on Caleb’s cheeks with his nails and burns Caleb's face with the end of his wand or sometimes, when he’s bored, Crucio comes into play. He also talks a lot: about himself, about Death Eaters, about dark times and how people should thank him for killing them.

He drops the Blindness spell once just because he wants Caleb to see him and says his name for the first time. 

Mollymauk, dark purple hair and bright red eyes, Caleb for one small second even forgets where he is and starts to think as a scientist again. Mollymauks’s — Molly for you, cause we’re friends now, yes? — hands are covered with tattoos and Caleb for some reason focuses not on the skull with a snake coming from its mouth, but on a small golden sun and moon on his left wrist, before he renews the Blindness spell.

“Don’t you want to burn me?” he chuckles madly, tightening the ropes even more, “And everyone else here.”

Caleb already understands how he talks and how he does things, it’s not that hard to comprehend, so Caleb never replies.

“Just like you burned my team back there in your lab,” he laughs and throws in yet another Cruciatus, and laughs even more when he hears Caleb breathing heavily from all the pain. “Or just like you burned your poor muggle parents.”

“They sure screamed so loud, didn't they?”

“They sure would’ve wanted their precious sweet Caleb to live,” he probably smiles again. “So start talking, pretty boy.”

Caleb never replies.


	17. stars (caleb/essek, preslash)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> caleb, essek, xhorhouse and all the stars
> 
> free interpretation of "dancing lights" spell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you love undeadwood, stupid memes and clapping to music then you can check out this beauty [@reverendclaps](https://twitter.com/reverendclaps)

“I miss them sometimes,” Caleb says suddenly when he and Essek sit once again on the roof under the tree and read.

“Them?” Essek looks up from the books that Caleb gave to him and raises his brow. Caleb rarely just talks, he mostly asks something about drow, and their society, and dunamancy, and Essek sometimes.

“The stars,” Caleb looks up and points to the dark sky. “You don’t ever see them in Xhorhas and in Rosohna especially”.

“Do you remember the sky too?” Essek asks, putting the book away and gliding closer to Caleb.

“Yes, for now definitely yes”, Caleb smiles gently, looks at dark, almost black sky for another second and starts to draw something in his journal. Essek sits down closer to him and waits patiently, viewing the tree with it’s magical garland and all the shrines and softly looking at Caleb.

“So,” he finally says after some time, stands up and starts creating small light globules, “Here we will have the Roc, here… the Hammer and the Sword together, ...”

Caleb names constellations one after another and moves his “stars” around to create them.

“That’s…quite impressive, your memory is fascinating,” Essek follows Caleb’s moves, watches him intently and listens to him with unconcealed interest. “According to sky studies of your people right now mine is… that.”

They sit there for a long time, and look at the lights, and talk about almost everything from how stupid astrology is to why cats are absolutely the best, and laugh, and read again, and Caleb is almost not surprised that Essek doesn't pull his hand away when Caleb gently corrects him, showing the right sigils for the spell.

Because it all feels so fucking right.


	18. dressed up (au halloween party, caleb & molly, caleb/essek)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> talking and talking and more talking
> 
> same uni au as chapters 2 and 11

“I hate Halloween so much,” Caleb grumbles silently while having his face painted by Molly in the store room of his bar, “Such a stupid holiday.”

“Oh, c’mon, mister professor, you love it,” Molly chuckles, drawing several final lines, “And it’s like, the only time during the year when i look at you wearing cat ears. So embrace it.”

“I’m doing this only cause I love Frumpkin so much,” Caleb stand up and looks at himself in the mirror. “And who are you dressing as this year?”

“Oh, you’ll see soon,” Mollymauk smiles widely “I’m gonna be a hella handsome devil this year!”

“Dressing as yourself for Halloween, how sad,” Caleb grabs his coat and nods to the door. “I’m going to wait for Essek outside”.

“R-u-d-e,” Molly replies, pretending to be strongly offended, “I bet that mister Maths Professor really likes Halloween.”

Caleb laughs with a shrug, putting his cat ears on after that, and leaves for the street only to meet Essek, to fail in saying something other that “wow” and to start writing Molly.

_**c.widogast**: he’s dressed as an elf_   
_**c.widogast**: with pointy ears_   
_**c.widogast**: and a long black robe_   
_**c.widogast**: and a fucking silver headband djsafjsjfdhk_   
_**mollythemauk**: he what_   
_**c.widogast**: he said that he used to be a cosplayer_   
_**mollythemauk:** he what????????????_   
_**c.widogast**: he loves halloween_   
_**c.widogast**: i love him so much_   
_**mollythemauk**: touché_


	19. touch (caleb/molly)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> being able to feel the touch of your loved one is important

All it takes is just one small touch, Caleb knows it now more than ever.

A touch to feel the pain and to try to calm down, to stroke his head and gently take his shaky hand into yours, to slightly rock all the jewelry on his horns and to get a kiss on the cheek or the forehead or on the withered lips.

Just a small light almost unnoticeable touch to feel the heart beating faster and faster and to embrace the warmth of the living being next to you. 

Caleb is just watching right now. 

He looks at how Molly moves and tries to memorize everything that he sees. Caleb looks at him bow with a weird, awkward unusual smile, Caleb watches him waltzing around the room and chuckles, when he remembers that night in Hupperdook.

Molly pets Frumpkin and looks at himself: at his legs, hands, his long and now irritating bangs — with the most loving and sad — _scheiße_ — expression. Molly sits, counting every scar on his arms and his neck and passing over his tattoos with his fingers.

_All it takes is just one small touch, right?_

Caleb reaches out with his hand only to touch a cold mirror in front of him and promises to himself to never change his appearance this way.

Tomorrow he casts it again.


	20. water (gen; fjord, uk'otoa)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fjord sees uk'otoa again

Fjord opens his eyes to only see the darkness around him and knows what comes next.

_Watching._

Bright light from countless yellow eyes blinds him for a second. He’s angry, Fjord knows that and Fjord is scared. He was scared since the first day and now when they found out that all the borders between plains are getting weaker and weaker he’s scared even more.

_Patience._

Uk’otoa was waiting for a long long time. For a right patron. For this right patron to come back to the ocean again. He was waiting for Fjord to arrive at Nicodranas once again.

_Return._

His torso starts to glow and Fjord sees that eye-like orb.

_Ṛ̶̚e̴̯͊t̷̺̕u̶̗͝r̶̯͆n̸̗̊.̷̯̎ ̵̨̇R̶̥͂e̴͇̓t̴̯͋u̶͚ŗ̵̂n̴͇̽.̶̛̳ ̸̠R̴̹ḙ̷̑t̶͚̊u̶̟̒r̷̞͆n̵̖͂.̷̦̎ ̷̗̔R̵̳̉e̴̦̊t̸̫͝u̴̟̎r̸̡̒n̷͉͂.̴̲̒ ̵͔́_

He tries to resist and feels pain. He tries to resist once again, but Uk’otoa is strong now, stronger than ever. Fjord reaches with his bare hands to his chest and starts to pierce it with his sharp nails.

It should be painful, but the only thing that he feels is tranquillity.

It should not be done, but it feels so right.

He struggles and tears the orb out. It shutters and the whole ocean shakes.

Uk’otoa is happy, Fjord knows it.

Laughter, terrible, disgusting loud laughter feels all the space.

_Reward._

Fjord starts to drown and swimming up doesn’t help, Fjord starts to lose consciousness and tries to scream, but that laughter continues.

_Release._

At that moment he wakes up and looks around the dome with a wide scary grin on his face. And then he, who once was Fjord, summons the falchion.

_P u n i s h._


	21. music (caleb/molly)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> molly talks about his amnesia and caleb talks about his past

“Sometimes I also just want to not remember” Caleb suddenly asks when they sit outside the tavern late at night. Molly just told them about two years of his life and Caleb was extremely silent for the rest of the day.

“You were holding longer that i thought you would, darling,” Molly chuckles swinging his tail slightly and tapping the wooden bench with his fingers.

“I didn’t want to offend you, but..” Caleb starts and immediately gets interrupted by Molly slightly squeezing his palm and saying that everything is alright. 

“I love my life right now, I love these past two years as much as I love myself, and you know what that means,” Molly continues, looking somewhere in front of him and stroking Caleb’s palm slightly, “And I really don’t care about this Nonagon or Lucien guy, but you.. I think you’re different”.

“I understood,” Caleb makes a long pause, trying to find the right words or maybe just calming himself, “that I never had a thought about wanting to forget before today, because I… I’m just not allowed to forget, that would be so… so selfish.”

Molly listens carefully for every breath, for every intonation in his words and curls his tail around Caleb’s waist. 

“If you can’t allow yourself to let something go,'' Molly replies when Caleb suddenly stops talking, “then you need to recollect the good memories as well. Even now...”

Caleb sighs heavily and closes his eyes for a second. 

“My mother used to sing to me a lullaby almost every night.” Caleb smiles with a sad look in his eyes, “She had a very beautiful voice.”

“Can you sing it for me?”

Caleb looks surprised, maybe — definitely — even scared and closes his eyes again, for longer this time. And then he starts to sing, quietly, a bit hoarsely. He obviously sings in Zemnian and Molly understands almost nothing, he only keeps gently stroking Caleb’s hand and absorbs every sound, every good and bad note and every mid-lines breath.

“She sang that much better than me,” Caleb says after, again with a smile and almost unnoticeable sob.

Molly kisses him lightly on the lips and smiles back.

“Remember that.”


	22. pets (caleb/molly)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> caleb has way too many pets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> based on my twits: [here](https://twitter.com/gingerminded/status/1202175320117383169)

“That’s, like….” Molly closes his eyes for a second and throws his head back. “Unhealthy or something? I mean, who am I to judge, but...”

But Caleb has way too many pets for his studio, and Molly is not overreacting: yes, he shares a chair with a cat, a dog and a parrot, but he sure isn’t overreacting. When Caleb comes back from the bathroom, holding a tarantula, Molly starts to question his existence and life choices once again.

“Oh, wow, that’s new… Frumpkin number one million, i suppose?” Molly asks when Caleb quietly puts the spider back into his aquarium and carefully takes his parrot, also Frumpkin, from Molly’s shoulder and chuckles slightly.

“There’s like… only eight of them?” Caleb replies and lies down, his head on Molly’s knees. “Not a big deal.”

“Mr. Caleb, you have seven pets named Frumpkin and say that it’s not a big deal,” Molly laughs and automatically puts his fingers through Caleb’s hair. “I think it’s a big deal. How do you even know who you’re talking to?”

“It’s intonations that matter,” Caleb sighs and closes his eyes, “And if I say that I love Frumpkin, I betray literally no one of my beautiful room-mates!”

“Why do i even love you,” Molly leans down a bit and kisses Caleb gently, “You’re such a nerd.”

“The person who asked to be my eighth Frumpkin when we first met,” Caleb smiles widely into Molly’s lips “... has literally no rights to call me a nerd.”


	23. embrace (caleb/essek, frumpkin)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Wait here, please, i need to talk to my cat", Caleb says while unlocking the door to his apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> same uni au as chapters 2, 11 and 18

"Wait here, please, i need to talk to my cat", Caleb says while unlocking the door to his apartment.

"I'm sorry, you need to do what exactly?" Essek asked raising his eyebrow in confusion.

“Talk to Frumpkin. You know, clever, ginger, beautiful blue eyes”, Caleb starts his “Frumpkin is perfect” speech once again, ticking points on his fingers, only to be interrupted by a light kiss on his lips.

“Are you sure you’re not talking about yourself, mr. Widogast?” Essek smiles cunningly and glances at the door as Caleb pretends to be shocked and pokes Essek gently into his forehead.

“I hate you”, he says, finally opening the door.

“No, you don’t”, Essek laughs quietly. He waits for a couple of minutes, checking twitter and some homework from students quickly, before he decides to enter. He knocks off a book pile right away and only God knows how avoids knocking another two of them.

“... he’s very important for me, okay?” Caleb is sitting cross-legged on the floor opposite Frumpkin and pets him. “I’m sure you will be the best boy, because you are the best Katze out there”

“W-o-w”, Essek exhales loudly and then hears a deep sigh from Caleb who just lies down on his back hiding his face behind his palms once again.

“I asked you to wait, Essek”, Caleb whines. Frumpkin lightly bites Caleb’s cardigan before standing up with a pleasant meow and walking up to Essek, scratching his trousers with his paw. “He wants you to pick him up and you better do it well, mr. Thelyss. He seems to like you already”

“Of course, he does”, Essek smiles and picks Frumpkin up and pets his belly. “You two had quite a conversation about me, so…”

“Oh, shut up,'' Caleb sits back up, laughing in response.

**Author's Note:**

> my twitter: [gingerminded](https://twitter.com/gingerminded)  
my ficbook: also [gingerminded](https://ficbook.net/authors/177462)


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